The Extermination of the Hurricane Lamp

In honor of my son, Jack’s seventeenth birthday and the approach of Hurricane season….

As summer rolls around most people think of mountain escapes, beach bumming, and barbecues. For us South Floridians, those thoughts turn to batteries, bottled water, and my favorite–canned culinary cuisine. In other words—“Hurricane Season.” From June until December, my pantry is stocked from floor to ceiling with foods I wouldn’t normally consider buying, much less eating. Vienna sausages, pork rinds, Spaghetti-O’s, and beef jerky become gourmet delicacies. And who could possibly live without that mouth-watering treat—Cheez Whiz in a can? I hate to say it, but once I nearly wrestled a little old lady to the ground for the last can of Spam on the shelf. It’s a time to rely upon your wits and survival skills, even if you’re only in the wilds of the canned meats and vegetables aisle at the grocery store.

Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Beehive Blues

A lot of you had my Mama for a teacher. Many of you have commented over the years about her resemblance to Doris Day, but what you may not realize was what was going really going on underneath that flawlessly coiffed beehive all those years ago…until now.

Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Fifty– The New Eighty

As I sit writing this my floater annoyingly hops across my pc screen, reminiscent of my childhood Captain Kangaroo or was it Romper Room’s, “follow the bouncing ball singalongs,” I realized age is in the eye of the beholder.
Last week found me at what used to be my favorite doctor’s office—the optomotrist, a place that I formerly considered a humilation-free zone– no tell-all big mouth scales to ruin your day there. But there’s more than one way to humiliate a cat or in my case a fifty plus woman.

Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | 3 Comments